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Saturday, 4 June 2011


Pleasure Me by Monica Burns  2 Stars

I originally bought this book because I was interested in the switch of the stereotypes normally presented in a romance novel. The usual 25 year old virgin and the 30+ manwhore that has shagged anything with two legs..

This story presented a 29 year old man, Garrick Stratfield, who had never been with a woman, he was dare I say it, (gasp), a virgin. And a 41 year old woman who is, yes you can roll your eyes, a Courtesan/Mistress, Lady Ruth.

So I bypassed the title (cringe) slipped my book cover - that my lovely mother made me - on it and dived into it.

Well... I am not impressed.


The story premise was disappointing. The only reason Garrick Stratfield, our hero had not been with a woman was because he was missing one ball. His uncle Beresford, humiliated him when he was about 17 years old and it scarred him emotionally from that day onwards.

Lady Ruth was ditched from her last patron for a younger mistress, and so she is insecure about her age, as she is 41 years old. Did her a favour, if you ask me.

So self esteem is a big issue in this book. But the thing that irritated me the most was the repetition, it was constant. Garrick's humiliating memory is repeated almost every page. I got the point.
Lady ruth is so fixated on her age, that she uses it as an excuse to end her relationship with Garrick and therefore forcing herself to be alone. I just couldn't feel sorry for her after awhile.

The colloquialism was terrible. The first time I read the word 'rod' I cringed, by the third and fourth, I was rolling my eyes praying for it to be over, so I didn't have to imagine Garrick with his rod and only one ball, with all this emotional insecurities.
I probably sound a little insensitive at the moment, but phooey!

You can use, cock, dick, penis, love wand, might wang, dingle dangle, shaft, member, even stiffy, don't ever use the word ROD. (oh god, penis isn't in my thesaurus) And never ever ever call a woman's doodah, a cunny!!! What is that?? urck!!
And do not have your hero, in the midst of sex with your heroine, compare sexual intercourse with his hand. People, what is going on?? Focus!!!!
Furthermore, do not under any circumstances have your hero call the heroine a 'whore.' WHAT THE??

Well if anything, it was a lesson on what not and how not to write, sex, romance, characters emotional background, etc etc..

It was degrading and disappointing. Garrick's growth in this story was just to have sex, which he did and after about 3 visits he was an A+ student. (they refer to eachother as tutor and pupil in the story) Lady Ruth never really grew much in this story, she is dismissive of Garrick's feeling up to the last few pages and annoyingly obsessed about her age.

I think the Author could have built a better background or character arc for Garrick and Lady Ruth, something that could have been more believable. Maybe I had too high expectations for this story and its possibilities to take me outside the norm and status quo.. I am usually the first person to praise a book, even if it doesn't strip me bare and tear my heart out, but this one.. I don't rate it.

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